Mooooove Over Obama....

Along the lines of sayings such as "Never trust a man who smokes a pipe", and similar adages, the one that should go to the top of the list would be:
NEVER trust a city whose two most famous historic figures are (Mrs.
Oleary's) cow and (Wrigley Field) billy goat.
'Nuff said,right?
I mean, this is the same city that gave our country John Wayne Gacy & Emo Phillips, no?

No Cow Required

Similar to the cries heard in Chicago close to 150 yrs ago and very much like the wails heard throughout North America since the Broad Street Bullies entered the league, Chicago will be experiencing a little déjà vu this weekend,when the citizenry will be panicing in the streets, screaming "RUN FOR YOUR LIVES, THE FLYERS ARE COMING!!!"

Bad Omen

Donovan McNabb, the highest profile Windy City son previously residing in our town, who was known for Chunky, choking & Chicago,was sent packing about a month back- much to the relief of Philly's fan base. So onward & upward, we got rid of a failed Chi athlete who underachieved, and we will now take out the overachieving 'Hawks.
Cue up some Paper Lace, for as there was the Great Fire of 1871 in America's most corrupt city (yes,even then!), so this year will be remember as The Great FLYERS of 2010!
"I heard my momma cry, I heard her pray the nite Chicago died! Glory Be!"

Look Mom No Hands !

With a name like that, it goes to figure that Joel Queenville is in charge of the moustache rides in Boystown. Vrooom ,Vrooooommmm!!!

Separated at Birth: Part III

Dustin Byfuglien and
C. Thomas Howell (Soulman)

Separated at Birth: Part II

Patrick Kane and

C. Thomas Howell (Outsiders)

Separated at Birth: Part I

Duncan Keith and Beetlejuice

We interrupt the regularly scheduled NHL blog...

Begorra!!!
It seems as though those NBA Leprechauns have had their Magic stolen.
If this comeback is pulled off,and coupled w/ their city brethren Bruin's epic collapse only a few weeks back,look for a fast food franchise to rise out of the ashes,appropriately named:
Boston CHOKIN' !!

2 to 1 odds this sells out in Boystown by noon

Today's Chicago Tribune Poster.

Two and a half men

Wow. How often can you find a man built like a girl, and the girls built like men.


http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/01/27/patrick-kane-takes-a-sexy_n_439305.html

Cheapskate

Yeah, I know we already covered this,but we never gave the holla to our Philly cab companies.
So, a shout out is in order to Victory City and all other local cabbies.
Consider yourself warned: be on the lookie for this hackney beating hockey player, who adminsitered the beating all for the sum total of 20 cents.
Howz 'bout we see if Tex Cobb feels like driving a yellow car around town for the next week and a half?

Canada Crys, Ginger Wails

http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/2010/writers/allan_muir/05/25/stanley.cup.final.preview/index.html


Allan Muir, SI's red headed step child & hockey prognosticator, whose choice of the Flyers & Devils 1st round series ending in five was only correct in the number of games it would take. Allan had all sorts of other incorrect series winners in his time w/ the publication and has, no surprises here, chosen the Blackhawks in 6 games.
Here's hoping that he remains as on target as he's ever been.
And as Clark Griswold, ironically a Chi towner, said to his redheaded kid: we leave Rusty Allan Muir with this line. "Great talk son. Go to bed Russ."

Bonnie and Carl would be proud!

http://sports.yahoo.com/nhl/blog/puck_daddy/post/Kane-arrested-after-allegedly-assaulting-robbin?urn=nhl,181695

With this type of boorish behavior,is it of little surprise that he chose the jersey # 88.

Blackhawk Homer

Here's a mascot worthy of the Second City.

Member of the Sauk Tribe.

You two have been spared

-
...Meatloaf said 2 out of 3 ain't bad( or four out of six) .
Many have pointed out that if the Flyers take out the 'Hawks for the Holy Grail, the victory trail will have been littered with 3 of the original 6 NHL teams.
But I challenge that, and put forth one more Orig Six team as a victim: New York Rangers. The Blueshits were disposed of by the Flyers in a do or die play-in game on the last day of the season.

I am barely breathing

http://www.suntimes.com/sports/2314464,duncan-keith-blackhawks-toughest-25.article

Duncan Keith # 1 toughest? He's more like Duncan Sheik ,when you consider the Orange & Black's # 14. His injury is pedestrian compared to Ian Laperriere, Broad Street's Ultimate Warrior.
He's second fiddle, give 'em the finger middle, Fool for another day!

NED = Non EDucated

http://www.chicagobreakingsports.com/2010/05/dodgers-gm-says-blackhawks-in-6.html

Ned probably thought the same thing with the Dodger's team he assembled the past two years. That's right, the same ones our Phillie's dismantled on their way to playing in TWO consecutive World Series.
Stick to things you know, Ned....like Second City, Second Place, second grade.

Da' Hawks

http://www.chicagonow.com/blogs/chicago_sports_mob/2010/05/chicago-blackhawks-players-pronunciation-guide.html

Bandwagon ?!?!?!?!? More like Radio Flyer wagon !!!!! Bandwagon consisted
of EXACTLY one driver and "D" List star Jim Belushi only three years ago, prior to Toews & Kane's arrival.
Windy City full of Blowhard fans!

Amen to that

Goin' Old Testament; FLYER & Brimstone:

Arron ready & Able to waste Kane.

CURSES!

As the Tugger famously said, EWE Gotta Believe!!


Billy says Philly in four!

BOOOUUUUUCCCHHHH

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jdldstk5Gtc&feature=related

Do you remember where you were when this glorious ride began, on a beautiful Sunday afternoon, 44 days ago?

Kramer, I'm not

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_wNmxRSj8sc

I see our captain regarded as somewhere between Clarkie (#16) and Davey Poulin (#20) - very fitting that he wears # 18.

scalping now allowed on Broad St.

What is it with Blackhawks and guys named Keith?
They can't seem to hold on to their teeth ?


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9xbc_TsEqm8

Madison Blues

Madhouse on Madison to go head to head with Slaughterhouse on Pattison.
Wear your colors, feel welcome !!

Blackhawk Down

Welcome to Philly. We'll help you live up to your high expectations:
Prepare to be TAZED, Captain Serious!

RIP

http://www.montrealgazette.com/sports/hockey/montreal-canadiens/Habs+Flyers+Game+showdown+historical+twist/3063678/story.html


Philadelphia, the "Birthplace of Hockey" ?!?!?
SACRE BLEU, WHO KNEW !?!?!?!?!?

But what is for certain, it WILL BE the resting place for the '09-'10 Montreal Canadiens!!

Thanks for dropping by

Jacque Martin has announced one lineup change: he is "dropping" Mathieu Darche back in the lineup.

HABS Comeback ????

FROGETABOUTIT !!!

FRENCH TRADITION:

Begging for mercy from their knees, or pleading to be spared from Scotty Gomez eye level.
Merci beaucoup!

HAB-dashery

http://www.habsinsideout.com/game/hab-vs-flyers-may22/10

Canadien's hopes all but dashed on spanking & blanking by Flyers!

STFU

Habs honor legendary player, Steve Shutt, by letting Flyers SHUT them out for the third time in the series!

Like Sand thru the hour glass....

One Game to Live.

Canadian Clowns pull a Bozo No No

After outplaying Philly badly throughout the game, Canadians decide to go out of character and attempt to rough up the sleepwalking opponent....Hab it your way....Order was quickly restored, as Hartnell & Richards enforced a clown sitdown.

Subban rubbin?

Despite PK's method of celebration, it wont be a "happy ending" for the Habs.

Boone-ing it up?

http://www.habsinsideout.com/boone


This lazy arse , French appeaser was right in quotes attributed to Flyers & summation of said game: that the Habs owned Philly throughout.
But to think that the little tadpoles were actually going to bully the Broad Streeters with numerous crosschecks & runs at Giroux, Briere & Gagne thruout the game, and climaxed by stick to Briere's face in the closing seconds, well...lets just say that we won't allow a Frog to Turtle.
You paid the piper,and not even Larry Robinson himself was going to save you.
Thanks for the wakeup call!!

Ding Dong

It's game night, fans begin to prepare themselves for what most are dubbing: DEATH KNELL AT THE BELL".

Taser him

REAL MAN OF GENIUS alert!!!!:

Degenerate Flyer fan, who destroyed esteemed Montreal Gazette columnists Pat Hickey's car @ Wachovia parking lot Sunday nite, may have been caught due to the punk posting photos w/ license plate on Facebook!
Throw the can....errrr....BOOK at him!!!!
Vegas has set odds at 5-1 that it was THIS guy!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QECEsZVrbMA

Remember to pack your sandwedge...

Hab's coach Jacque Martin calls team meeting to discuss golf outing & vacation plans for next week.
Also, calls in legend Larry Robinson to demonstrate Canadian protocol of how to surrender.
Seriously though, making a couple panic changes in lineup, notably purse thief & huge stiff defenseman Ryan O'Byrne & underacieving & part time minor leaguer, LW Benoit Pouliot.

Uhhhh....right, like I was saying, hole # 5 is a par 3.

Rocky Start for Habs

No rematch for Appalling Deed ?

Why, it seems like just yesterday these merry little pranksters were sneaking around Philly, pulling this Les Habitant "sweater" over our town's Iconic landmark Rocky statue.
SacreBleu!!
Since then, they've performed like Spider Rico, goin' 0-6 in the playoffs vs the Broad Street Bullies.
And THAT my friends, is the difference between Champs and .... CH umps

Flush Twice

On the heels of Vancouver's disatrous Winter Olmpics slogan (Own The Podium), and with the current horrendous play of Les Habs that is leaving their fans sick to their stomachs, the Canadien's have come up w/ a dead on slogan that bests reflects their followers current condition (Own The Imodium).
Just shittin' with ya! Ole!

Yippee for Youppi

Montreal Canadien mascot Youppi was ecstatic upon hearing the news that a worse mascot than him had finally been created. (See 2012 London Olympic mascots revealed today). In all fairness, he should've been terminated as a mercy kill, along w/ the Expos.
Seems like just yesterday that, during a game between the Phillies and the Expos, some years back, Harry Kalas pointed out the horrific mascot to Richie Ashburn. His Whiteness responded: "Looks as though someone went Youppi all over him."
Classic.

PURSE-suit of the Cup

Wachovia Center reports that purse snatchings have gone up a whopping 300% since the Montreal series had started, investigators have no leads.
In a related story, Hab's defenseman Ryan O'Byrne was a healthy scratch again, giving him idle time for both home games in Philly.

http://www.canada.com/theprovince/news/story.html?id=0961f342-bdb2-466f-acfa-9bd527e71750&k=83087

We Represent

Series Update: Gionta, Gomez & Cammalleri (from left to right ) remain scoreless, but if you ask them, they'll tell you their trying really, REALLY hard!

JE ME RENDS !

Elimination Riot Update: Will still be held Saturday, but pre game as opposed to post.
Prizes will be awarded for the Best White Flag, the person who can scream I SURRENDER the quickest in French, and the individual who can hold both his arms up the highest.
Also, Montreal sport columnist Pat Hickey's car will be on site, painted w/ the Habs logo and the words WE GIVE UP! So bring your sledgehammers and let's have some fun. Let's show Philly what were really good at!!!!

Believe it Orr not

"Four score,seven games ago...."

Still funny that after the Bruin's unveiled this Bobby Orr statue outside the TD Garden prior to series with the Flyers, his hometown team honored ol' # 4 - twofold: How? by losing 4 straight games, climaxed by giving up 4 straight goals!!
ORRacle of the Buckner magnitude!

Make mine a double...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pOhKHjbFJV8

To help you relax before the game, may I suggest a Canadian Clubbed?

Hexy we miss you

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DR-ZgMz3FIU&feature=related

Jump around! Jump Around! Jump up & hit a Canadian clown!

Boxcar Philly

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=StOAkVgAXQ4

Game Nite Advisory: Don't get there late, watch a leisurely pregame skate!
PS- Love that ol' tradition, Boxcars for the pregame ice prep instead of Zambonis!

You'll shoot your eye out

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z2l6RnWM2tU

Habs 6'7" forward and smack talker Hal Gill ends up being non-factor,plays and acts like 3'8" namesake Grover Gill.
Quite simply, he got his Scott Fark(in)ass kicked.

Sponge Chris

Oooohhhhhh..... Who drops a forward in a flash to his knees?
Crunch Pop Square Plants
Pummels Canadiens as we use to w/ Guy ?
Crunch Pop Square Plants
If ass beating, punch downs is something you wish
Crunch Pop Square Plants
He will oblige n' rest of your shifts you will miss
Crunch Pop Square Plants
Crunch Pop Square Plants
Crunch Pop Square Plants
Crunch Pop ....Square Plants!! HAHA

Flyers 6 Habs 0

Montreal elimination riot tentatively set for Sat.
Stay tuned for more details.....

History DOES repeat itself

Bad Omen from the Uh Oh Department.
On May 17th,1940, Germany occupies Brussels ,Belgium and begins invasion of France.
This surrender re-enactment currently on display in Southwest Quebec.

Habs caught with pants down ?

HABitual loser and 3rd generation Canadian Socialist Kiefer Sutherland watches Les Habs les lose embarrasingly, ironically looking identical to his movie "Flatliners".
No word yet if recovery has been approved by his grandfather Tommy Douglass'
Canadian Universal Health Care.
Like Ace Merrill in Stand By Me, he walked away embarrassed.

The Igloo is closed

Hats off to Coach Abysmal, of defending Cup champions, who bowed out to the 8th seed Habs. The Pens committed 20 turnovers to Canadiens 1 , all the while blocking 3 shots to Montreal's 26!

EXIT QUESTION: In a hockey game, couldn't you "accidentally" block at least double that amount just standing in a face off circle? Nice job coach, way to have your team prepared to play & defend your title.

Cel-OUT-tic ?

Nah ....Just keepin it real with his Philly roots.

Rask, you suck.

From Tuukka to palooka: Julien announces human sieve, Rask, will be on a short leash - to be relieved by certain improvement Eddie LeBec.

Tune in later this summer when we discuss possible late season bullpen help for the Sox, by way of Mayday Malone.

The apple doesn't fall far....

http://www.echl.com/cgi-bin/mpublic.cgi?action=show_news&cat=1&id=22178

Trivia time: put on your "sinking" caps.
Guess whose minor league affiliate just choked away a commanding 3-0 lead, a first time ever in the ECHL?
If you guessed the Lostin Ruins, you are definitely Wicked Hahd Smaht!!!!!!

Here comes the Rain,man

Be it an Oscar or winning the Stanley Cup, take it from Kirk Lazarus (Tropic Thunder):

Never go full Savard.

Good night Chara

The Big Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz......finally figured out that witty nickname. Maybe one more MRI (Mike Richard's Impaling) will do the trick.

Game Day

http://mystuffspace.com/graphic/pooh-bear-friday.gif

Time to pop the balloon .... silly 'ol bears!

mama said knock you out

Penguins study game film of fellow player Matt Cooke, execute the "lay down"
to a T...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MLqpw_uKyds


Hey, need clarification regarding Penguin traits, is it flightless, or FIGHTless? HABat u let me know when they wake up.

Brother, where art thou ?

Claude and Alfred - seperated at birth ???

Today's poll question:

Which was more horrifying :

Hitchcock's attack of the Birds?

or Julien's collapse of the B's ?